Read Kill the Farm Boy by Delilah S. Dawson Online

Kill the Farm Boy

Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, a hero, the Chosen One, was born . . . and so begins every fairy tale ever told.This is not that fairy tale.There is a Chosen One, but he is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened.And there is a faraway kingdom, but you have never been to a magical world quite like the land of Pell.There, a plucky farm boy will find more than he's bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there's the Dark Lord who wishes for the boy's untimely death . . . and also very fine cheese. Then there's a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini. This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, the Dread Necromancer Steve, and a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar "happily ever after" that ever once-upon-a-timed....

Title : Kill the Farm Boy
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 9781524797751
Format Type : ebook
Number of Pages : 384 pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

Kill the Farm Boy Reviews

  • Jessica ☕

    Here goes a positive review for a book that I did not finish.

    Doesn't appeal to my sense of humor, oddly enough, considering Mr Hearne's other works are some of my favorite in the genre. I'm the one person is the world who finds puns irritating -- it's lonely out here.

    If you enjoy puns, double entendres, flowery-but-silly writing (imagine the narrator of Amelie or Pushing Daisies), jokes that go on a little too long (imagine Family Guy) or buddy-comedies, then this is the book for you.

    But, alas,
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  • brittany

    DNF after 15 pages, so I’m not leaving a rating. I wanted to give it more of a chance but at this point the tone & style are pretty well established and I know it’s not for me. The ‘humor’ of this book has consisted so far of jokes about poop, farts, boogers, a fairy who doesn’t bathe, and a dark lord who yells about crackers while trying to force a hedgehog and a turtle to mate. I maybe would’ve found this funny when I was ten? (Maybe.) Subverting fantasy tropes in a funny way is a fine ide ...more

  • Amanda Kratz

    I gave it a good college try but I just couldn’t get through it. DNF @ 54% (and I really pushed myself to make it that far). I never DNF books and I just couldn’t get into this at all.

    It is so over the top slapstick humor that it becomes detailed and boring. Yes there are many quips I laughed at and there are some clever jokes to be sure but quantity is not quality. It’s just too much all the time. It’s like watching a never ending episode of a comedy series without the heartfelt moral at the en
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  • Robin Bonne

    No fantasy trope or gender cliché is safe from being turned into a joke in Kill the Farm Boy. The clever writing and action packed absurdity had me laughing out loud several times.

    Staph, a tricky pixie, sets Gustave the goat, and his pooboy, Worstly, on a quest because it is their destiny. Then, they meet up with more hilarious members of their questing party, including a vegetarian warrior, and a bunny-woman bard.

    This book was fantastic. It dealt with many problems I have with the genre, but i
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  • Beth

    Monty Python meets every fairy tale you could imagine plus some and you've got Kill the Farm Boy. Packed full of slap stick humor, outrageous characters and fairy tale antics to the extreme! Part of me cracked up laughing and part of me was shaking my head at the outlandishness. While reading, I couldn't help but think this book would be perfect for those who love the comedy of SPACE BALLS the movie. It was just a fun, fanciful read.

    I received this ARC copy of Kill the Farm Boy from Random Hous
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  • Michelle

    I knew that “Kill The Farm Boy” is meant to be a more light-hearted romp of an adventure story, but I really didn't find it engaging. At first I was chuckling, then rolling my eyes, then shaking my head, then getting angry -- until I couldn’t wait to get it over with.

    This was advertised as a comic fantasy in the tradition of “The Princess Bride” and the “Discworld”stories, but its humor is nothing like those. The humor attacks rather than amuses, and with long sections of jokes about bodily excr
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  • Mark Gardner

    I absolutely lurved Kill the Farm Boy. I’ve read more Delilah Dawson than Kevin Hearne, but I’ve read and enjoyed them both. The easiest way to describe Kill the Farm Boy is that it is Spaceballs, but in a fantasy setting. Everything that I loved about Spaceballs is everything I love about Kill the Farm Boy. Puns, double entendre, slapstick situational comedy, and a general irreverence to the genre the writing duo parodies. Plus, Dawson and Hearne don’t take themselves seriously. When the author ...more

  • Dianne

    My Rating: 3.5 Stars

    Strap yourself in, make sure your sense of humor is safely nestled in the crook of your arm, this nonstop ride is about to leave the station without nary a rest stop in between, which may or may not be necessary, depending on how well you can hold your puns.

    Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Ahearne are running an author tag team with satire fantasy and the quips are flowing like a chocolate fountain at the All-You-Can-Eat buffet. KILL THE FARM BOY leaves no stone unturned when it c
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